Friday, August 6, 2010

Happiest Hour: The Evaro Bar

Posted By on Fri, Aug 6, 2010 at 3:30 PM

The sun's out, the heat's on and we're chomping at the bit to bust out of the office for a weekend of floating, fishing and drinking. What's new? Well ironically, the crew that helped put together this week's Happiest Hour is heading back to the very same establishment this evening for another round (or, you know, five). Here's why we think you should join us.

This week: The Evaro Bar

Atmosphere: Your typical highway-side Montana bar, complete with Keno machines, pool tables and framed posters of scantly clad Maxim models next to the urinals. Patrons are few on a recent Saturday afternoon, but one semi-comprehensible regular assures us it’s usually packed. Bartender Amy Chalcraft’s tally from one Tuesday eight-ball tournament in July confirms his ramblings: 30 competitors, plus plenty of spectators. They also offer free pool every Sunday and Monday. Just keep the kids away from the X-rated claw machine at the back. Anatomically correct rabbit keychains aren’t a prize for the young’uns.

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What you’re drinking: Evaro has two specialty drinks, each as dangerous as its name implies. You can try your luck with the Crack Pipe—a shot of Stolichnaya with Red Bull and your flavor choice of Puckers. We opted for the Bull Blaster this time around (Chalcraft’s taken to calling it the Blue Ball). One shot of Stoli Blueberi, two shots of Red Bull, tossed back like you’re ripping off a bandage. Drinking buddy Bret Robinson spent the ensuing 10 seconds shaking his head before asking, “Why’s the world moving so fast?” Kyle Boe merely looked confused, wondering aloud, “Where am I?”

Claim to fame: One look at the Evaro Bar’s menu tells you everything you need to know about their famed $12 burger. They call it “The Tank,” and a seeming disclaimer sums it up as “Evaro’s stomach bomb.” It’s more than a pound of beef piled high with lettuce, tomato, pickles, onions, bacon and two layers of cheese. The trick, as we found out, is to eat as much as you can before the monster decides to topple—or before your stomach realizes what’s happening. Oh, and it comes with a generous helping of tots.

Happy Hour: Plenty of specials to choose from during the week, but we recommend just hanging out long enough to take advantage of Evaro’s “train shots.” Thanks to the bar’s proximity to the railroad, patrons get a free jello shot every time a train passes. Gives new meaning to the phrase “Every hour is Happy Hour.”

How to find it: Head up U.S. Highway 93 toward Flathead Lake. Keep your eyes peeled for the left turn after you crest Evaro Hill. It’s about 15 miles from downtown Missoula.

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